UNFORGIVENESS...

What Unforgiveness do You Hold within Your Heart..
Do You know.. If You do not forgive.. If You Hold an offense against another.. or even your self.. even God perhaps.. You will NOT be forgiven.. the Lord says clearly.. FORGIVE .. or you will not be FORGIVEN Lay down Your Unforgiveness.. for Yourself.. Let It go.. Let the Lords Grace.. Heal Your wounds.. and His Love consume Your heart.. You perhaps forgave.. but perhaps it wasnt from your heart.. it was from your mouth.. Let the Lord take it.. visualize the person.. and put the issue/person within the BLOOD and let it be washed away... from your Heart.. RELEASED

Mark 11:26
Matthew 6:14-15

A Deep Change in the Atmosphere

My Spirit is so so unsettled.. We must awaken.. we must repent.. we must stop all this hoopla.. and Bring the Lord God in.. Open the door Church He is knock knock knocking.. He doesnt want a performance.. He doesnt want a joke.. He doesnt care about your theater seats.. or your stage.. He doesnt care about the size of the building.. or all the festivities.. God Cares about Repentance.. Truth of the Word.. and the Church equipping the body to do His work.. for His Glory.. Not for Your own!!! Can you not feel it in the Atmosphere.. The Lord is speaking.. can you not hear.. Oh Who ever has ears let Him hear.. who ever has eyes let them see.. What the Spirit of the Lord is saying.. Hearken the Voice of the Lord.. take Heed..

IN THE STORM

In the storm is where we get refined..if we stop fighting it..murmuring and complaining.. and start.. truly just praising the Lord.. knowing His word is truth.. and even when You cant see the answers.. If your His Child You know He would never lie to you..and His word says He will use all things together for good.. for those who are called according to his Purpose.. and He also says..Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.… but Remember You must Let it have its perfect result.. so that then you will be perfect and complete.. How Is it You respond in a trial.. in the storms of life.. do you run from them.. do you shove them under the rug so to speak.. not dealing with them.. do you complain.. and murmur .. or do You do as the Word of the Lord says.. that is how you become refined.. ~marni~j~j~

DREAMS FROM THE LORD PRESS THROUGH.. DONT QUIT..

A Dream given to me by the Lord I personally have had a few dreams which the Lord is showing.. first.. the enemy is coming to our home front.. and  also that the enemy is trying to get those the Lord has called.. to be silent..  
One night I was laying in a DEEP SLEEP and I felt Danger.. I knew I must not only wake up.. but get up and flee... I truly pushed through my dream which really was showing.. I was pushing through obstacles..deep obstacles and that I could not give up.. had to push beyond what I was capable and call unto the Lord in My Spirit for His Help.. I kept hearing PRESS THROUGH DONT QUIT.. YOU MUST PRESS THROUGH  Needing to ensure I was close to the Lord and did not fall back.. I had to fight my way to the top.. I tried with all in me to scream but only a squeal came out.. and I finally pushed through and Ran.. running to my door and opened it.. and there stood a "man" no face" just a man down on the walkway beneath my Porch.. and He said I GOT YOU... well I must admit that shook me up a bit.. I truly at that point in time didnt know if the Lord was warning me of things to come or if He was saying the enemy was at my door.. In other words in my inner circle.  Now both have a profound statement with me.    
So with that said... first there is a WORD for all who walk with the Lord.. Watch who is in Your inner circle..  Watch who Your telling Your heart to.  Watch who Your running to.. Watch and listen and follow the Lord as You could be the very one causing your own self to be in Danger.. Yes danger.  What .. You think if you walk closely with the Lord the enemy is not going to try and trip you up and take you down.  He will come at you anyway he sees is vulnerable..
Another Dream I had.. was sleeping.. in my dream and I flet.. I could not breathe as if someone had their hand on my mouth.. keeping it clamped down.. and I pressed.. and pushed and fought.. and it was truly as if I was fighting in the spiritual realm.. pushing hard to get up and get released from this so that I could Breath.. pushing pushing pushing.. and then finally.. breaking through as if a fish out of water.. and taking a big gulp of air.. and in this I found the Lord was saying to me that many were trying to silence me.. to keep me from speaking the word He has called me to speak.. because the word.. they did not want to hear.. as they would  rather.. lay within their compromise and have their ears tickled..

Will the Church Awaken?

As this day comes to a close.. well I have much on my mind.. as I watch the events of the world.. the Nation.. watching the events in North Korea.. I watch the Church as for the most part they seem to be silent.. in a slumber.. without a clue.. Just like in the days of Noah.  They are running here and there and having their fun filled activities.. so many unaware of the sign of the times.
It seems there are more who are of the "world" who are awake than those within the Church.  When I go into the church to hear the word.. I have not found one local that is even speaking on the end times and repentance.  So many are in this false sense of all is ok..   They feel they moved the hand of God to bring Trump in and all is well..   Not even thinking well ok Yes God did bring Trump in but was that for a reprieve to give us another 4 years.  Another 4 years of what.  The same thing in fact even more so.. killing more babies and now not just making it legal to wed man with man woman with woman.. but now.. well we are pushing the markers.. and teaching within the schools.  Kindergarten.. that one can be what ever they choose.  Or not.. and now it is also within the military they are saying they have these rights.. Really.. when I went in the military you did not have any rights.  You were there to serve your country and even one with flat feet was not allowed to serve but now it is what... transgender and sex changes at the expense of our Government and we truly think God is holding His hand from coming down upon this Nation.  We were a nation that was founded upon the Principles of God and the 10 commandments and now if You speak about god many want to threaten a legal action against you... oh but yes.... God bless this Nation.. No.. that is not how God works He cannot  work up against His word.  He is God.. He is a God of Love but He is a just God.  I suppose many just do not want to look back and see how well He was grieved he even created man... and destroyed all but Noah and His family who had no genetic flaws.  And Sodom and Gomorrah..  We forget and sadly many think Because Jesus Came and Died for Our sins and we have grace... That what.. Grace will cover this??

Gods Hand in the Operating room

Well here I am.. in a position I had never been in before.. Im not taking about the medical procedures.. hospitals.. etc.. no.. Im talking about.. wow.. the HEART.. with all the Lord had walked me through in my Medical healing..the HEART was a curve ball for me.. so.. here I find myself on this very early morning.. having things.. stuck in me.. and people.. telling me of the procedure.. what to expect etc.. I remember the head nurse.. so kind.. so peaceful.. well as they all were.. she leaned down.. and she spoke softly to me.. and I will never forget here words.. she said "dont worry.. we are ALL believers on this team and each morning we give our hands to the Lord.. and ask that He bring those to us.. and to do His will through our hands.. as we all give Him glory and know that.. without Him.. our job is.. just a job" Such peace.. I had.. the Surgeon .. Dr Griffin.. was then speaking softly to me.. telling me each step.. as he was to do them.. He told me that I would feel some pain.. as he stuck the needle in.. I did not.. he told me.. I would feel.. well things that.. I was so blessed.. I did not.. The Lords Hand was upon me.. He took any of the pain that I truly should have felt.. and He gave me His peace.. Peace that was not of this world.... The time within the room.. did not seem long.. and when completed.. the Dr leaned down and said.. wow I did not expect that.. He said no stent is needed.. no surgery is needed.. he said.. we normally do not see heart attacks.. with this condition.. as usually it is found prior to this.. and dealt with.  when someone makes it to this stage.. they usually have died..This situation is where my own arteries.. were not clogged by plaque but were spazming for sometime.. cutting off the blood flow to theheart.. As this had been going on for a couple of months.. well.. it had damaged the heart and at the time of my heart attack I had 28% of my heart function.. The Cardiologist placed me on 4 meds.. all that dealt with blood pressure but one imparticular that helped the heart to function and to well.. rebuild itself so to speak... I remember telling him Im sure I wont be on these Long.. as well.. I know the Lords hand will be upon this healing... This condition is for a better term .. called a Broken Heart.. normally is caught before the Heart Attack and treated... and when at the Heart Attack that is normally concluded in Death.. Oh But God..

A Heart.. Broken...

It has been to long since I have been away from my blogging.. I will attempt to share.. the many things which have gone on.. One I will mention is October 17th 2015 I woke.. early with pressure.. Pressure I could not explain.. I took a pain pill and attempted to go back to sleep.  the Holy Spirit nudged my heart to send an email to my mom.. To say to her that I was sorry for disconnecting a call a week or so earlier.. We had been talking.. talking of the things I had been going through and most recently a very painful break up with the man I had thought I was going to marry.  One that I had just made a trip to.. but.. it ended in.. such pain.  I will revert to that later.. while on the phone with my mom that evening.. discussing the sale of my home .. the place and family I was now living with.. My eldest son.. and the man who broke my heart in a million pieces.. I just could not think of these things any more.. I could not talk.. I was weeping so hard.. that I had to say.. I need to go and disconnect the call.  sadly I found out from my sister.. via a text that my mom had held this against me. Had taken it personal.. but it truly was not.. so here.. very early this day.. I was moved to say.. I am sorry mom it wasnt personal. I love you. I said no more .. wasnt even led to share the pressure I felt upon my chest.. So laying back.. I tried to drift to sleep once again but.. I woke again.. quickly.. the pressure had gotten worse.. now I had this strange ache in the left shoulder.. I said.. "Lord?" and I heard in my spirit.. Heart attack.. go to the hospital.. so.. I had already gotten dressed when I woke the first time.. So.. I got up got my shoes on and gathered my trash from upstairs and slowly walked down the 3 flights of stairs to where my friend was.. and my Maggie.. my beloved Maggie.. my best friend.. My dog of 10 years.. faithful.  I went to my friend and said.. "Alice I need to go to the hospital" I did not own a vehicle at this time as I had sold it to move to the state with the man I had thought.. I was to marry.. anyway.. Alice said.. ok.. I will go brush my teeth.. I had a little chat with my Maggie.. and told her.. Mama may be gone for a bit.. and how much I loved her.. to be good and take care of Alice and Lorenz  then off to the hospital we went.. I sent word to my friend Jenifer and told her headed to the hospital.. I said it is my heart.. oh before I left I had posted on FB for prayer saying.. on the way to hospital.. while my friend was chatting with me she had asked the Lord show me my Angel James.. who I will share the story of later.. funny I asked the Lord the same thing.. my friend did not know.. So Alice drives to the hospital right up to cardiac unit.. Funny I did not mention to her it was my heart.  Inside we find no one in line.. the lady at the desk turns her back to us and says she needed to clean the counter area up first.. I said.. "Lord" I need your help" and then out of the door came a nurse and she called me back.. though I had not been signed in yet.. she sat me down took my pressure.. It was way up.. 200/104 my friend.. said her .. Oh dears.. and I looked at her and said Alice I need you to be calm.. I do not need to be stressed.. so if your back here I need that ok.. Then the nurse did an EKG and another nure came through the door to the back.. and grabbed it.. taking it back with her.. within minutes.. not even.. I find a wheel chair is being put beneath me and I am now signing the registration papers etc.. off to the back we go and I find a room with a team of people in it.. all busy.. doing their tasks they are to do.. no chaos.. no real talking.. just each doing as they are trained to do on this team.. I find that I am being undressed.. given aspirin and nitro under the tongue.. .. IV's inserted.. blood drawn.. This team was like a well oiled car.. an engine.. that all the parts.. worked well together.. each doing the task they were called to do to make this.. "orchestra" work and play well together.. beautiful music.. I just kept thinking.. wow.. Peace.. I looked up and saw the man who appeared to be the Cardiologist/surgeon.. discussing with another.. leaned up against the wall.. looking very serious.. I heard some of it.. and well it sounded.. like he apparently felt.. a very "odd" challenge.. not certain which test.. was giving him the info.. perhaps all of them combined.. he then walked over to me and leaned down.. and in a soft peaceful voice.. one sure and steady.. he said.. "you are in the middle of a large heart attack and I would like to do a cath.. while in that procedure I will either do a balloon or if not able.. open heart" I said well how important is it that we do this.. and when do you want to do this.. "cath" this time when He looked at me.. I saw the face and deep eyes of James.. My Angel.. and he spoke so sure and in command.. the words were.. very important and NOW immediately..not a moment later.. So alrighty then.. I said.. lets go.. and I handed my phone to Alice.. asking her to please contact my sons and tell them.. I have so much to share on .. my sons..so I pray you all are led to follow this story.. I will be reverting back in time.. and jumping ahead.. as the Lord leads me.. it is a story.. of deep healing.. one of which I am going through even still.. as the Lord continues to sift me.. to mold me.. and to break the chains.. which held me.. as Our God uses ALL things together for good.. for those who LOVE Him and are called according to His purpose... so.. this post I will end with.. my words to my friend.. tell my sons.. I love them... I love you Alice.. tell my Maggie.. I wont be coming home.. tonight.. </3